The Man They Call Cayde

All joking aside—maybe I've made mistakes. Maybe some more recently than others. Hard to believe, I know, but maybe it's true. Maybe. Here's the thing about mistakes: you learn from them. Again, this is assuming the theoretical concept of me having made…

Now, to be clear, yeah, the plan is to tell it like it is, but don't expect every little detail to play out. I'm gonna hit the important stuff, sure, but what I'm really after here is a sense of… a sense of me. Because once you understand me, you just might…

Made a deal with myself, long ago… If people needed help and I could do the helping, I would—so I do. Yeah, when that help returns a bit of loot or goodwill my way, all the better, but there's never been a cache I robbed or a stash I hid that didn't offer…

Ever heard of Andal Brask? Ya should've. One of the old heroes. Before Black Gardens and Hive gods and that Cabal-shaped mess we just cleaned up. Yeah, he was… somethin'. Hunter part of the Vanguard before yours truly. More importantly… He was my friend. A…

I play nice with the Vanguard now, but it wasn't always that way. Not that we were enemies. We just tended to see things through a different lens. But Andal…? Playing nice was his forte. He was always more… I think "diplomatic" is the word? Our big play…

Case you can't tell, I ain't the best storyteller. I can be. Boy howdy, can I rip a yarn! Don't believe me? Ask C.C. Don't believe him? Ask the Colonel. Those two have heard things you wouldn't believe. Just that, this…? What I'm doing here, the whole "based…

Taniks didn't announce himself. Didn't say a word. Just laughed a few times and tried like hell to kill us all. But we knew it was him. The stories matched the story, ya know? Which meant the boogeyman had a face—the boogeyman was REAL. We could hunt "real."…

Hey, kid. I know I don't write you very often, ya know? But it's better than never. Ain't easy for me to find the words. I mean, it is, I find them. But I know they're not always the right ones. Too much flash. Too much looking out for how I'm looking, not…

Honor? It's tricky—means different things to different folks. Like your word… Well, your word's your word. You GIVE it. You KEEP it. Do that, regardless of all the rest, and that's honor right there. And, let me tell ya, kid… Honor matters. It's a weapon in…

Back to honor. Back to Andal. Andal was my brother. Figuratively, but I find, more often than not, the family you unearth along the way is more real than the family you thought was the… Never mind. Andal was my brother. Period. Taniks was the four-armed,…

Taniks was a pain. Turns out that wasn't the real problem—though it was high on the list at the time. The real problem? The freak's STILL a pain. He ain't no Guardian, but the dude's been dead and not more times than I can track. "Died" twice by my hand…

I don't play well with loss. I just don't. It's something I tend to avoid. Actively. It's weird, but… that's where my Queen comes in. And before you make a Reef joke, or mention that witch and her Witches, or her mopey little brother… Don't. My Queen is not…

Been trying hard to give you a sense of what matters to me, but also to find a way to talk about the things that, uh… that scare me. "Thing," really—singular. And that thing is… loss. Losing. I'm a poor loser, I admit it. I run from it. Full speed. Others…